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Five Keys to Enhancing Your Emotional Intelligence
Emotional intelligence in its strict terms is the ability of an individual to identify, make use of, comprehend and manage emotions positively so as to reduce stress, communicate in an effective manner and empathize with others to overcome their challenges. Emotional intelligence (EQ) has a profound impact in our lives and greatly influences our other human characteristics such as our behavior, our interaction with others and the way in, which we react to different situations. Different people have different EQ levels. Those with a higher EQ generally posses the ability to comprehend their own emotional state, that of others and engage in a manner that draw people to them. Therefore, EQ can be a good tool in influencing and improving the behavior of other people, form healthier relationships, achieve greater heights of success at the work place and engage in a more rewarding life. According to the five listed attributes of emotional intelligence, I am good at the following;
One aspect of EQ that I am good at is my ability to stay composed and stable when under pressure. The article puts forth a good way of managing pressure by keeping it cool so as to avoid being either too assertive or reactive to a situation. This is an art of EQ that I have a good mastery in, especially when under stressful environment. Being composed gives me time to analyze the situation before coming up with a conclusion on the way forward this attribute guards me against stereotyping others, being more open to their perspectives as well as obtaining sufficient facts before reaching any meaningful judgment. Maintaining calmness while under pressure assist me in preventing a snap up as a result of pressure. When calm, the objectives and goals are approached in a sober manner without any prejudice from the emotional effect of pressure.
Being able to deal with my own negative emotions is an attribute that I have learned and used frequently to avert failure. The article propagates that to be able to change our feelings and emotions; we first have to change our thinking. It further denotes a therapy developed by Dr. Amen which emphasizes that, in order to manage our negative thoughts we have to kill our automatic negative thoughts. I have embraced technique by being positive and having a positive perspective at the world. This helps to a great part in significantly reducing the chances of harboring negative thoughts, feelings and emotions. For example, I tend to view the enormous potential in an individual and what one can become in life as opposed to how they are now.
Another aspect of EQ that I have developed mastery over is the art of reading social cues that are communicated by people around me either by word or through body language. The article propagates that it is prudent to seek more information from parties with ideological differences in an attempt to reduce any misinterpretation. This is an aspect of EQ that I am good at and use to amicably find a common ground in a dispute. It entails obtaining clear information from each party through means such as open ended questions so as to remain objective in settling the issue. A good example is when I solved two parties that differed ideologically. I made inquiries from each party separately as to the reason behind their behaviors which, I let them know, I was not comfortable with. Finally, I was able to understand the feelings and emotions of each one of them and reached an agreeable conclusion for both. It is as a result of disseminating the cues from their behavior that I managed to establish a problem.
On the other hand, there are some facets to emotional intelligence that I need to improve on. These are;
Having the knack to be assertive and articulate intricate emotion where necessary. The article spells out that it is prudent to have stands or rather boundaries on certain matters, which includes ‘’no’’ as an answer. Although I have some degree of assertiveness on matters that I am sure and have facts about, there are instances that I am left on the balance as to which stand to assume. I fail to establish a clear boundary on matters that are rather theoretical. It is an area of EQ that I seek to improve as it goes a great length to determine how I relate with others under different social set ups. From the article, I have gathered that I need to use subtle language that does not put the recipient on the defensive but rather receptive side. This makes the recipient to open up and freely give whatever that is being sought from them.
Developing an ability to convey cherished emotions in close personal relations. This article suggests developing a ‘bidding’ personality which is a way of sparking a positive connection between people who desire close relationship ties. This is an aspect of EQ that I have to work on to improve and develop my social ties. This is an art that can be done severally to bring forth a positive connection of intimacy for close relationships. For example, getting to know how a person is doing is a way of verbal bidding and this a positive means of expressing intimacy to close relations. Therefore in a bid to develop on this front, I undertake to do more practice on my relations and internalize it.